trust you've got a game plan

[isawallflower]

[ At noon on Wednesday, Riley's standing ready in the dining hall, with a clipboard and a big smile to anyone who shows up. She's set blank stacks of paper on the table, but we'll get to that. As promised, there's some basic snacks as well as some tasty banana bread. Snacks for everyone! ]

Welcome everyoooone~! Thank you so much for showing up. This is a new and confusing experience for all of us, but I'm sure if we strive to stick together and cooperate, it'll help us foster the most productive environment that we can. [ Bright, bright smile. ] So! I've gathered all of you so we can share any discoveries and compare basic information that might give us any idea of why we've been brought here. Good? Okaaaay!

[ That smile never leaves her face. She sets something down from her clipboard and starts passing out that blank paper. ]

Sooo, following my example, if you could fill this out, that...can be a good starting discussion!

[ Her example is essentially a survey. Wonderful penmanship, again. ]

Comments

[justmeheere]

[You know how you can sometimes look at a person and know they're internally screaming? Jeremy's internally screaming.]

Oh. Cool. Uh. M-mountain Dew is really high in caffeine and sugar, so. Everyone should, uh. Be. Cautious? If you're going to drink it.

[please don't drink it please don't drink it please don't drink it]

[isawallflower]

I probably should've provided some kind of sparkling water.

[mcfife]

[This young man is not well. Clearly.]

So I should only drink a little of it? [Is Jeremy worried that he may accidentally poison himself?]

cw: you ever just have a panic attack about soda?

[justmeheere]

[How much Mountain Dew activates a Squip? He doesn't know, because he thought it was a fucking scam, but apparently Christine has a Squip so that implies they're real unless Christine's profile is lying, but why would Christine's profile be a lie when his is 100% true and Stephen said his was mostly true and -

DEEP BREATHS, JEREMY. DEEP BREATHS.]

Probably? [His voice cracks on that.] It's just, uh. Super unhealthy. Like all American food.

[mcfife]

[He slides the bottle away from himself.]

Not all food in America is unhealthy. [There must be something that Jeremy is not at ease to disclose.] Jeremy, what's going on?

[justmeheere]

Um. It's just. [He hesitates.] This is going to sound super weird, but just don't. Don't let Christine drink it? I don't think she knows -

[The profile says deactivated, and he doesn't know how you deactivate a Squip but he knows how you activate one! And it involves Mountain Dew, so. Bad. All around bad.]

- what Mountain Dew does.

[mcfife]

Why shouldn't we if it's dangerous?

[...Also taking the ice cream off the table.]

[justmeheere]

Uh, it's. Um. Err.

[Jeremy is having an internal struggle right now. Please hold. Then, all in a single breath:]

There's supercomputers from Japan and I thought they were a hoax but Christine's trivia says she has one but it's deactivated and you activate them by drinking Mountain Dew but I'm worried we might all have them and the Phantom's gonna use them to control us.

[Didja get all that?]

[mcfife]

[.............................]

Are you saying

[He leans on the table, hands folded, with a serious look.]

That this supercomputer is a threat to us all?

[Wizards from Japan made a sinister computer that is activated by a cheap drink? How evil!]

[justmeheere]

It's a gray, oblong pill
Quantum nano-technology CPU
The quantum computer in the pill will travel
Through your blood until
It implants in your brain and it tells you what to do

[As he sings this, Jeremy appears to almost subconsciously be doing some weird hand motions. That's probably fine.]

[mcfife]

[This is extremely concerning!]

Mind control computers! If we had all had one implanted, then it would be only a matter of time until they were activated!

[He clasps a hand on Jeremy's shoulder.] Is there any other way to protect ourselves from this? Can we remove it?

[justmeheere]

I don't, uh. I don't really know a lot about them? I just know they exist and you activate them with Mountain Dew. They're, like. Super top secret dark web stuff.

[Hey, Jeremy? Why do you even know about them if they're so secret?]

[37773972]

There's what.

[justmeheere]

They're from Japan.

[He says that like it's supposed to be an answer, which. It sort of is? Kinda. Not really.]

[37773972]

[If he hadn't already landed on the concept of them being from parallel universes, this would be even more alarming than it is. As it stands, though, uh???]

...is Japan trying to take over the world where you're from or something?

Just gonna pop in real quick

[etincelledefierte]

...I promise, not everyone from Japan has a crazy computer in their head.

[37773972]

[oh no]

Jeremy, do you need some air? I can go with you. [If he wants.]

[justmeheere]

I'm fine! Really, uh. It's just - [He glances nervously between the Mountain Dew and Christine.] It's probably fine and I'm just cata, cata, catastrophizing!

[Haha. Ha. That's definitely it.]

sorry everyone's hijacking this thread but

[madgiganticfeelings]

Jeremy?

[Hello Jeremiah, there is now a tiny girl sliding in beside you to grab your hands. Something is off and she may not know what, but she can't let a friend of hers panic so badly!]

Jeremy, what's wrong...?

[justmeheere]

N-nothing! [Everything.] I mean. It's just. It's just soda. But you shouldn't drink it.

[He sounds dead serious when he says the last bit. Please don't drink the Mountain Dew, Christine.]

[madgiganticfeelings]

Okay. I won't. I'd like to know why I shouldn't, though... if you can tell me?

[He sounds serious enough, though, that she isn't even going to argue with him.]

[justmeheere]

[He hesitates, but then he gently squeezes her hands.]

I might just, uh. This might be paranoia, but there might also be a, a potentially evil supercomputer. In your brain. And I - it's not fun when it's real, you know? The zombies, I mean.

[madgiganticfeelings]

...Are you talking about that piece of trivia on the programs? It, um... it sounds a bit like a SQUIP.

[Yep, surprise! She knows about those! Her eyes go wide as she realizes what she's implied.]

But I never had one, Jeremy, I promise you. One of the kids in my drama camp had one, and it was really bad, bad enough that I wouldn't ever choose to take one.

[justmeheere]

You know about SQUIPs? [He blinks then narrows his eyes.] Did Rich corner you in the bathroom and try to sell you one too? I mean. Well. It probably wasn't the bathroom, but. Just. You know!

[madgiganticfeelings]

Rich? No, no, I didn't even know he had one! That would explain some things, though...

[Her eyes narrow right back at him when she processes the rest of what Jeremy said.]

Wait, he sold you one? Jeremy, you don't have one, do you?