itscurtains | Let's Gather 'Round the Campfire and Sing Our Campfire Song

Let's Gather 'Round the Campfire and Sing Our Campfire Song

[Well last week Spongebob decided that the Wizard was nothing but a big fucker and everything was all his fault so he is going to kick his "Boost the moral of his friends" scheme into overdrive to rub it in the Wizard's stupid face.

Around the school on Monday, there will be Spongebob's huge mass of fliers again, this time for some sort of camp out.]

Spongebob Squarepants Crazy Camping Party!!!
Come to the edge of the forest on Monday at 5 pm for a whole night of roasting marshmallows, telling Spoooooky stories, and sleeping under the stars!
Don't worry if it rains, we can always bring the camp inside!

Attendance is MANDATORY!!! I will come find you if you don't attend.

[And he absolutely means it.

Even though there are no stars, it's a comfortable evening with no real signs of rain, and Spongebob's managed to set up a cozy Spongebob set out a bunch of blankets, towels, and pillows around a cozy campfire. There are plenty of food you'd normally see at a camp out, including smores! Spongebob seems to have gone all out and brought in practically every kind of candy from the kitchen, so have fun with the sugar rush!]

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[ No one can possibly say no to Spongebob. Orpheus arrives to the campout with Eurydice, looking a little more excited than she is, though he's also a little hesitant, keeping a wary eye on the cloud cover. Still, he's brought a hasty apple cobbler he threw together, and his ~~lyre~~ guitar slung across his back. He settles down next to Eurydice, portioning out bits of cobbler in little tinfoil parcels and settling them near the fire to reheat.

When it comes time for stories, Orpheus lights up, picking up his guitar. ]

This one's a little more sad than scary. [ he says, thoughtfully. ] But I think it might be appropriate? It's the story of Medusa and Perseus. My mom told it to me, a long time ago.

[ After that, he'll happily roast marshmallows with the others, though he has a bit of trouble preventing his from melting off the stick and falling into the fire the first couple of times. Eventually he seems to get the hang of it, though, making smores and laughing with the others. He seems relaxed, and while there are occasional moments where he stares off at in the direction of the garden in silence, he'll quickly snap out of it if he notices anyone looking.

Eventually, he falls asleep near Eurydice, curled by her watchful form on a blanket near the fire. ]

[Ah... Elsa knows that one. A few versions, of course; the ones she read as a child, that took out most of the terrible things that happened before Medusa became a gorgon, and the ones she read as an adult. It always seemed... sad, to her, that Medusa was punished so terribly for doing nothing wrong.]

I'd love to hear it.

[Orpheus is a good man, a kind man. A tale of Medusa he would tell must lean quite heavily on the unfairness of her situation, right?]

[ Orpheus nods, and starts to play a delicate and mournful tune, slow and haunting. ]

Medusa was a beautiful girl
Pursued by men was she
But she had no patience for that sort
And refused their company

Oh Medusa, turn your gaze
Upon me, so they cried
But she cared not for them
And closed indifferent eyes

Poseidon was a confident god
And smitten with her was he
He thought that he could win her heart
And make her his devotee

But Medusa, she refused him
And he flew into a rage
And chased her to the temple
Of Athena, wise and sage

Athena was a merciful one
She took Medusa's hand
"No man shall touch you from this day hence,"
She said, "Now take a stand."

Medusa was a beautiful girl
But no more was she just this
Serpents unfurled from her hair
Bright-eyed and soft of hiss

Oh Medusa, turn your gaze
Upon us, cried the men
But when she looked upon them
They would never move again

Poseidon fled from her new visage
Even him, appalled and afraid
And the men that followed him fled too
Leaving statues in their wake

Medusa found power in her new gift
At first, but soon she'd see
That stony gaze was limiting
Her chances at company

Oh Medusa, turn your gaze
Away, cried all who saw her
So for seven lonely decades
Exile was what seemed only proper

Until one day, a weeping boy
Stumbled into her cave
She hid from him and asked him what
Made his fate seem so grave

"My mother is a beautiful girl
Pursued by men is she
But they do not wish me their son
And I was forced to flee"

"What is your name?" she asked the boy
And "Perseus," said he
She said, "I've lived a long and lonely life,
So boy, listen to me"

"Take this knife and behead me
Do not look me in the eye
Show it to your mother's suitors
And this fate you will defy"

Perseus did as he was asked
Mourning all the while
He did not wish to kill her
But she was ready for this trial

And so Perseus went home
Medusa's final gift in hand
And the suitors who were not frozen
Scattered throughout the land

Oh Medusa, turn your gaze
Upon these unruly men
Who harass unwilling women
So they never will again

[ He continues to play as he finishes singing, looking around at the gathered listeners. ]

Perseus gave Medusa's head as an offering to Lady Athena, after he'd driven away the men threatening his mother, and Lady Athena honors her tragedy and sacrifice by bearing her visage on her shield. They say Medusa's shade still appears sometimes, to protect women being hounded by men who would harm them. I don't know if that part's true? But it's... not nice, exactly, but something to think about.

[There's a sense of awe on Elsa's face as Orpheus sings. In the weeks since they were brought here, she's grown rather fond of the man's voice. But it's not just the music, but the words; all of the legends she's read write of the wrath of Athena, of how cruel her punishment was to Medusa, the victim of a greedy god.]

It's sad, but... I like it. It's... nice, hearing one version of that tale that focused on the woman, not the monster she became.

[Hitting close to home? That story? Nah.]

I've never heard of Medusa's shade living on to protect other women, though.

There's other versions, that make her out to be a monster, like you said, or make Perseus into one for killing her. But this is the one my mom said was best.

[ Whether 'best' here means 'best to tell her very young son' or 'best as in most accurate' or some other metric is unclear. Calliope wasn't one for explaining that kind of thing, very often. ]

That last part's a little more folklore than history, but I guess I wouldn't be surprised if it were true? Sometimes when people are blessed by the gods they become more than mortal. Though it might also just be something people added later to warn boys not to treat girls badly.

I've heard that usually, that sort of blessing from the gods means they're put in the stars, not turned into shades.

[Though even then, the stories of some of those constellations conflict so much. Some constellations were bittersweet, like the fate of Callisto who'd been put in the heavens before she could die. But then there was Orion and Scorpio, forever immortalized as the great scorpion chased the hunter across the skies...]

... I don't think Perseus was wrong, really. In any version of the story. He didn't know what happened to Medusa, did he? If not, I don't think he was bad for killing what he thought was a heartless monster.

[ Orpheus nods. ]

Usually, yes. Or turned into trees, or flowers, or streams, so they can live on as something else. And I agree, about Perseus. He was just a boy trying to save his mother. But it's hard to see Medusa as a monster either, even in the versions where she didn't go into exile willingly. At least for me. She couldn't help what happened to her.

[Farrah's less than helpful at first as he keeps. Dropping his marshmallows into the fire. But eventually, probably just about the time that her laughter is getting kind of mean, she leans over---]

Okay, you've gotta stick it on there further, and hold it above the fire, not in it.

Oh - okay, thanks. [ Orpheus gives it another go, making sure to get the marshmallow on the stick more securely and holding it higher. ] I've never had marshmallows before? I guess I should be trying a little harder not to waste them like this. Aren't they kind of expensive?

[ Every candy is expensive when it's the dustbowl and you're poor but ]

Technically, everything here is free.

...But no, they're pretty cheap. Perfect camping food. [She blows off her own marshmallow, cooling it down a bit, before extending the stick to Ruddiger, who is more than happy to monch down on the gooey snack, and get it all over his face.]

That's true. I've just only ever seen them in really nice candy stores in the city before.

[ Orpheus watches Ruddiger cram a marshmallow bigger than his tiny raccoon fists into his mouth with some vague concern, but decides that if he didn't like it he probably wouldn't be eating it, and that's what matters. ]

I've never actually been camping before? The weather's not... really good for it, back home. Ever.

Really? Your parents never just toss you in the back yard, like "Oh, Play Camping!" pretending like it's not just an excuse to get you out of the house for the night?

[She looks at Ruddiger too, then shrugs. She knows its bad for him, but he loves it.]

My new family goes glamping. You don't actually camp. You go into the woods, and stay in a very fancy cabin, near a bunch of other very fancy cabins.

[ Orpheus thinks about that for a moment before shaking his head. ]

I used to play outside a lot as a kid, but I always had to be back before sundown. Or before the heat of the day, when the summers started getting worse.

[ His mom may have wandered off on him, but she wasn't negligent when she was actually present. ]

That sounds... nice? Isn't that just going on a regular vacation, though?

[As Spongebob sees Orpheus struggle with the marshmallows, he laughs and offers him his own roasted marshmallow.]

Don't tell me you've never done this before! Roasting marshmallows is the best part about camping!

[ Orpheus will hold up a hand in a 'no thanks' gesture, though he smiles at the offer. ]

I haven't! I've never actually been camping before? I've slept outside a few times, but never on purpose, and it wasn't, um. Fun. This is nice, though.

Running from the law, too, huh?

[He... does not elaborate on that.]

But it is a lot more fun to go camping like this! The fresh air, the cool waters, the poison ivy, I love it all!

No? [ what ] Spongebob, have you broken the law before?

[ Badly enough that he had to go on the run from the cops?? ]

Well funny story about that. You see Mr. Krabs told me and Patrick that you can take anything you want without asking as long as you return it! So we decided to "borrow" one from a balloon vendor. And we wanted to return it, really! But it ended up popping and we had to run away because we kinda stole it then.

[He laughs suddenly.]

But it turns out it was free balloon day so we didn't get into trouble after all!

[ Well that sure is a lot to process. Orpheus sits there for a moment, just taking all of that in, before saying, ]

Oh. That's really bad advice? You should always ask before borrowing something, unless it's an emergency and someone could get hurt without it. [ He kind of hopes he doesn't actually have to say that, but, ] Who's Mister Krabs?

Oh, Mr. Krabs is my boss! He's really great actually! He lets me work extra shifts pretty much every day!

[He... is absolutely beaming.]

Oh. It's good that you have steady work. [ Not a lot of people have that, where he comes from. ] Does it pay well? It should, if you're devoting so much of your time to it.

Oh, I don't need the money! Working at the best restaurant ever is enough pay for me! I can't even remember the last time Mr. Krabs gave me a paycheck!

[ wait what ]

Wait, he's not paying you? Spongebob, even if you're already wealthy, [ ??? ] and even if you enjoy your work, the time you devote to it has value that needs to be recognized. Mister Krabs should compensate you for it. I think it would be illegal for him not to, in most places?

[ do they have minimum wage laws in bikini bottom ]

[Considering that the Krusty Krab has not been shut down yet, their worker laws probably Suck.]

Why would it be illegal? It's an honor in itself to work there! And sure, sometimes I work so much I forget to eat or sleep, but it's still fun!

[Please save him.]

Let's Gather 'Round the Campfire and Sing Our Campfire Song

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marshmallows

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Roast Marshmallow

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