itscurtains | Week Five

[Last week, you had your very first minor body pileup! Granted, the Balladeer's death was entirely unrelated to anything, but at least he died as he lived - getting completely fucked up in some kind of carnival-themed hellscape. Only two days later, another terrible accident took Rina and Varian both from you. It's just been one of those weeks, huh? At least you got to add both of their corpses to your weird growing collection!

Again, you'll wake up this morning with another new snippet of memory. You'll also find that the stairs in the lobby are no longer blocked. You can only access one part of the second floor, but it seems like there's some neat stuff up there!

Outside, a few things seem to have changed. For one, the weather has turned - it'll be overcast this week, with periodic rain and even scattered thunderstorms. For another, the bushes around that rock out by the football field have bloomed. That's nice.

Get to it, friends! I'm sure everything will be fine this week!]

Sunday | Monday | Tuesday | Wednesday | Thursday

(( Be sure to submit your memory regain and your AC for this week! As always, Hester's office hours and the merch booth remain available. ))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Right, so they're doing this. Orpheus takes a seat and puts his elbows on the table, folding his hands in front of his face thoughtfully before continuing. He doesn't look Discord in the eyes, just staring at the table in front of him. ]

What's it like? Living that long. Does it... does it get lonely?

[Ah. This sort of conversation, then.]

Well, I can't say companionship was really much of a concern until very recently. The closest thing I had to it was with someone who was also immortal and I was glad to be rid of her, honestly.

So it hasn't exactly come up yet.

Oh. I'm sorry.

[ That does sound lonely, but he has the grace not to point that out. ]

I'm just, um. I'm asking because I realized I might be immortal, or at least around for a really long time, and... I don't really know what to do about it, or how to feel.

[ Other than very bad and terrified. ]

Well, if you are immortal, then the good news is you'll have a lot of time to think about it and figure that out.

I mean, considering the average mortal lifespan, it shouldn't come up for at least a little while.

[Have you considered: just never think about it and then you can't get sad. Foolproof!]

Right. I guess I won't have to worry about it for... a while. And I don't even know if I actually am, yet? So it should be easy to just not think about it for now, but...

[ Clearly it's not, from the look on his face, weary and tremendously stressed. ]

...This is really bothering you, hm?

[It's extremely not subtle, of course.]

Those little photos are really getting to people. If it helps, I imagine there will always be others around that are similarly long lasting, so I don't know how lonely it really will be.

It is. They are. I'm, um. Sorry for bothering you about it, I just don't know who else to talk to.

[ He doesn't want to worry Eurydice by letting her know he's still thinking about it, even after they promised each other they'd figure it out. ]

I do have some friends who are gods and demigods who inherited their parents' immortality? But Eurydice doesn't have anything like that, and I - I don't know that I can live without her. Knowing what it's like to have her in my life.

...I suppose eventually the topic becomes rather unavoidable.

[Not that he'd know anything about that. It hasn't been on his mind before and, well. It... definitely isn't now.

Not in that way.]

I'm not sure if there's much I can offer. [Or if there's even anything to offer from anyone.] Having someone that important to you... Well, I suppose I could say something about her always being in your heart, but that's a little cheesy for me.

And... hardly the same, anyway.

It's okay. And I know she'll always be with me, as long as I remember her. But you're right, it wouldn't be the same.

[ He leans forward, resting his chin on his hand. ]

...I've already lost her once. And I'm going to get her back. Finding her again is the last thing I remember from home, and I'll bring her back, I'm sure of it. [ There's no point in considering what will happen if he doesn't succeed. He will. He has to. ] But just the once hurt so much - I don't know if I could bear to ever go through that again.

I don't suppose you could just find her and bring her back again, if that were to happen?

I don't think Lord Hades would let me do it more than once. Especially not if it were actually her time to go, and not...

[ He trails off, staring at the table. Her choice to go, rather than die slow out in the cold. ]

If it were that easy to convince him to let people out of his realm, someone else would've probably done it already? But no one ever leaves the Underworld once they've gone in. I'm already doing something impossible just by going. Who am I to think I could do it twice?

Who are you to think you couldn't? Just because it hasn't been done before, what, that means you can't? Certainly it won't be easy.

But you've already done the impossible once. Why not twice?

[is just going "NOT WITH THAT ATTITUDE" the most helpful thing here? no, but Discord is all about sticking it to rules and order and how things are meant to be]

[ For all his optimism, Orpheus is just... having some difficulty believing in himself, beyond the senseless hope of not being able to think about what could happen if he fails. He looks up at Discord, and there's a gratefulness to it, though it's tempered by a tremendous sadness. ]

I - I don't know. I guess it's true. I guess anything is possible. And is it really so much to ask - to grow old with the person you love, and follow them at the end of things? That's all I want.

[ He breathes out, and closes his eyes. ]

If I am immortal... maybe I could ask the gods to take it away. Or ask the to grant immortality to her, if I could make them see how remarkable she is. They've done it before? But... I don't think that's what she'd want.

I suppose those are options, but... Well.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but that seems like the sort of big decisions you should probably discuss with her, hm?

[ Orpheus nods. ]

We talked about it a little, when I opened the photograph. And I wouldn't - ask anything of the gods, without going to her first. I don't think she'd like the idea of either of us being indebted to them anyway.

[ They're technically his extended family, but that doesn't tend to count for much, with the other demigods he's met. ]

Sorry. I know you probably don't want to be in the middle of this. I can go, if you'd rather get back to reading.

I never said that. [This is the only time to talk about this, after all.] I'm not really the first person people go to for advice, but I understand it's not really the sort of thing most would understand.

I've been around for a very long time, so little things like mortality don't usually occur to me. I can't exactly relate to having any sort of... ending like that.

But if you're that worried about gods, you can always look elsewhere for some answers. Some of the princesses in Equestria might understand your feelings a little better. Celestia, especially.

Oh, um. Thank you.

[ He fidgets a little as he listens, picking at a scuff mark on the surface of the table. ]

Maybe. I'd still really like to go to Equestria, when we get out of here?

[ He looks up at Discord, managing a very slight smile. It sounded so nice, when he talked about it before. ]

I have friends who've been around a very long time at home that I can talk to about this, too? But it'd be nice to see what more people have to say about it. I imagine everyone deals with it a little differently. So. Thanks.

Week Five

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cw: suicide-adjacent discussion

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