itscurtains | And you can't pull me down

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act 3

And you can't pull me down

[ There's a groundhog anxiously pacing around the halls when suddenly everyone appears in the lobby and she's rushing up after all the initial reactions. ]

Wh... What happened?!

[ And where the FUCK is Maya UHHHHH ]

(ooc: y'all can respond to this however you want and make any generic top levels you need!)

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[The truth is that Maya has been watching her door anxiously. While she can appreciate his consideration in giving her space, it's been his face that she's been dying to see. After everything, the hope she had tried to impart on him and the despair that she had wrought, she wants to know that he's still there.

Of course, once he turns the corner, stares at her and lowers himself to sit beside her, Maya realizes that she's not ready. She's yet to get a grip on her emotions, has found herself weeping off and on since Peregrine had found her in the woods.

But then, even if she was fully resolute, she could never stomach any of this.

Balancing the tea in one hand, Maya lifts the other to stroke over his cheek. She thumbs against some of the stray whiskers, smile wobbling even as the tears begin to pour down anew.]

It's me, Otousan. I'm here.

[He knew, with Farrah, that the adrenaline was likely to make him yell, or scare her.

But with Maya's execution, there was no adrenaline. Nothing but quiet devastation, his empty arms, and then... Something. Everything. All at once.

If he goes to see her, he might find out that it's not real after all. That she did die and he just...didn't want to see it. Didn't want to believe it.

His cheek is stubbly, from where he shaved it before the dance. Her hand is warm and soft. He raises a hand to hold hers there, turning his face to kiss her hand, as the tears begin to silently pour down his own face again, as well.]

You can't... you can't do that to me again. I won't survive it.

[As he had held empty nothingness in his arms, waiting without watching for whatever awful sound would herald the end of the execution, he had only thought about the other razors still stored in his trunk, about Antonio's dagger, all instruments already drunk with blood, already taken lives - what would one more be, after all?

She's still hurt. He's still too broken to truly hope, again. But she's here- and for now, that's enough for him to hold onto.]

[The more Benjamin's tears flow, the more Maya's do. She shifts her own hands, wiping at some of his tears before writing it off as a futile effort. It hurts to sit up, but still she tries. She wants to throw her arms around him and cling to him like a child might.

Had she ever done that? It was hard to say. She can barely recall being a child.]

I -- Have something for you.

[She doesn't move to grab it, though.]

[He wants to hold her, desperately, but if he does he knows he'd squeeze so tight it would hurt her.

He settles for helping her sit up, scooting so that she can lean against him, instead of having to hold herself up, putting an arm around her back.

When she offers him something, he shakes his head.]

No. [That's too much like goodbye.] No, you're all I need right now.

[She sniffs faintly, trying to get herself under some semblance of control. There isn't much to be done about the way her breath quivers, though.]

It is something you should know. [But she doesn't fight it. Couldn't, even if she wanted to.]

It can wait.

[He isn't bothering to try and get control of his tears. They would fall whether he wanted them to or not. He lifts his free hand and scrubs his cheeks with the heel of his palm, then presses a kiss to her hair.]

You need to rest. Get your strength back up, so you can help us finish this.

Okay. Okay, I will.

[She hiccups faintly. How embarrassing.]

You won't be far, will you?

Never.

[She's allowed to be embarrassing. He's going to just sit here with her, and gently finger comb her hair.]

No matter what the pain,
We've come this far.
As long as you remain
I'll be right where you are...

[At least her little sniffles die off soon enough. His fingers in her hair bring back memories of a much simpler time between them. The trim he'd given her so many weeks earlier.]

Do you know what Otousan means?

[He's glad he can comfort her in that small way, anyway. He's glad he still has her here, warm and real against him.]

...No, I don't. You told me "san" is a term of respect, I think. Like "Mister."

[Back when she called him, essentially, Mr. Barker. Back when he called her Miss Tendo, before she was his Maya.]

You're right. But... when you had Otou --

[Saying it out loud is abruptly embarrassing. She has to swallow, take the time to process her words. These things had come so easily to Farrah, and while she knows she doesn't need to say it for Benjamin to know it, she still thinks it's deserved.]

Father. It's... a term for father.

[He waits for her, as she struggles to explain. But when she finally says it, his breath hitches in his chest.

It's not entirely unexpected. After all, he had called himself her father in the trial. When she had called him that the first time, it had filled him with the same kind of warmth he felt when Farrah first called him 'dad.'

When, years and years ago, Johanna used to stand up in her crib, squealing and shaking the bars in excitement, the minute she saw him come in the door.]

...I'm honored.

[When Johanna was locked in the asylum, he had given up on the idea of rescue, given up all hope. By the time she was rescued, he was too maddened with revenge, too obsessed with the thought of killing the judge to recognize his own daughter when she was in front of him.

He won't make that mistake again. No matter how much he wants to make the Wizard pay for all he's done.]

Thank you. For giving me a new chance to be a father. [He kisses the side of her head again, the arm around her giving a gentle, careful squeeze. Then a thought occurs to him, and he chuckles, the first laugh he's had in...days, for sure. Probably weeks.]

...And to think, Antonio predicted it before any of us knew.

Salieri-sensei was a very intelligent man.

[She speaks with a heavy layer of solemnity. Nevertheless, her shoulders shake with a faint bit of laughter. Of course he would have had something to say about all of this.

Still. She misses his words, even as she curls further into Benjamin's embrace.]

What exactly did he say?

Well... He cast us as father and daughter, didn't he?

[He says it with a small smile, his thumb rubbing over her shoulder gently.

It's still hard to think of his friend without feeling a pang of grief. To think of the man he himself was in those first couple of weeks, before he remembered how everything went wrong. But the fun he'd had, performing on that makeshift stage... Well, it's hard to forget that, too.]

He did. [She closes her eyes. Things had been simple back then. What she wouldn't give to go back there. What she wouldn't give to have cherished that performance, those moments with her friends.

But then, she already knew what she would give. And now the thought makes her uncomfortable.]

I... Was almost looking forward to seeing him again, you know.

...I can imagine.

[Said softly. Non-judgmentally. Farrah had said much the same thing, after her stunt on Wednesday. And when she'd woken screaming "Dad!" that night, he wasn't sure if she was reaching out for him, or for a ghost.]

But I can't say I'm sorry you were robbed of that chance.

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And you can't pull me down

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cw: suicidal mention

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