[ She looks down again. At their hands. Their warm hands that have felt like the only safe place here all day. ]
It's... hard for me to express myself or speak honestly about my feelings. But I've always wanted to change... wanted to be able to say the things I want to, or smile like other people do. I wanted to connect. That was why I thought about becoming a school idol, because then maybe it would help me change. That's why I use the Rina-chan Board.
But I... I don't have an idol club to join here to help me with that. And this is something I want to be able to say without using the board.
[ She thinks about Peregrine and Connor. She thinks about Peregrine crying. She thinks about the trial. The regrets.
She thinks about how it would feel in her shoes. She thinks about how she would feel if she were to discover Varian's corpse one day. How that would make her feel. What she would regret in that moment.
And she doesn't want that. She doesn't want him dead of course, she wants no one else to die. But nothing's guaranteed anymore. There could be another SQUIP. There could be many SQUIPS. She can't do anything about that.
But she can do something about this. It's hard, especially for her, but still. She has to try. She doesn't want any regrets. ]
You're... really important to me, Varian-kun. I'm really grateful you're here with me. And I... really like you.
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[ She looks down again. At their hands. Their warm hands that have felt like the only safe place here all day. ]
It's... hard for me to express myself or speak honestly about my feelings. But I've always wanted to change... wanted to be able to say the things I want to, or smile like other people do. I wanted to connect. That was why I thought about becoming a school idol, because then maybe it would help me change. That's why I use the Rina-chan Board.
But I... I don't have an idol club to join here to help me with that. And this is something I want to be able to say without using the board.
[ She thinks about Peregrine and Connor. She thinks about Peregrine crying. She thinks about the trial. The regrets.
She thinks about how it would feel in her shoes. She thinks about how she would feel if she were to discover Varian's corpse one day. How that would make her feel. What she would regret in that moment.
And she doesn't want that. She doesn't want him dead of course, she wants no one else to die. But nothing's guaranteed anymore. There could be another SQUIP. There could be many SQUIPS. She can't do anything about that.
But she can do something about this. It's hard, especially for her, but still. She has to try. She doesn't want any regrets. ]
You're... really important to me, Varian-kun. I'm really grateful you're here with me. And I... really like you.
[ Well a vague start is fine but-- ]