[There's a knight's helmet. Not evil enough, but it should work as the part of Zargothrax.]

Where to start? Well, it begins when I chased the evil wizard Zargothrax [He lifts the helmet.] through a space portal created by his terrible plans. As I flew in after him, I found myself on Earth, but something was different.

You see, it was the distant past, and Zargothrax had already conquered the kingdom with his army of undead and demons!

Horrifying fecal demons
rising up out of the caverns below
Dark robotic astral zombies
eating the peasants who live in Glasgow

Siege engines of hell's creation
Blasting the walls with unholy fire
Undead forces marching onward
Army of evil so tragic and dire